Inner Check: How Am I Really Feeling Today?

Because “fine” isn’t a feeling, and “busy” isn’t a mood.

Some mornings, I wake up feeling clear, focused, even energized. Everything flows. The world makes sense. I’m in my zone.

And then there are the other mornings.

The ones where my body feels heavy, my thoughts are foggy, and even the simplest task feels like a stretch. Instead of rushing into my day, I did something different:I paused. And I asked myself a simple question:

“How am I really feeling today?”

This is how I checked in — and why it made a difference.

Body Check: What is My Nervous System Telling Me?

Shoulders? Tense.Jaw? Clenched.Breath? Shallow.

We often forget that our bodies feel before we think. According to polyvagal theory (Porges, 1994), our autonomic nervous system is constantly scanning for cues of safety or threat. When we feel anxious or under pressure, our system can move into a sympathetic state—fight or flight—even when there’s no actual danger.

That muscle tension, that shallow breath? Not just stress. It’s your body trying to protect you. Awareness of this is the first step toward regulation.

So I started there—by noticing my body. Not fixing, just noticing.

Brain Audit: What’s Playing on My Mental Loop?

What am I telling myself today? Am I focused, calm, intentional? Or am I trapped in a mental loop of criticism, pressure, or doubt?

Psychologists call this cognitive distortion—our brain’s tendency to fall into automatic, often unhelpful thinking patterns like catastrophizing or all-or-nothing thinking (Beck, 1976).

Today, I noticed I was listening to a quiet but persistent mental playlist of “not enough.” Not smart enough, not productive enough, not ahead enough.

Just recognizing it helped me soften the volume.

Naming the Feeling: From Vague to Valid

“I feel off” is a start—but vague emotions stay stuck. So I asked myself: What’s the actual feeling underneath?

Naming our emotions is a core part of emotion regulation. As psychologist Dr. Dan Siegel puts it: “Name it to tame it.”By identifying specific feelings, we activate the prefrontal cortex (the rational, reflective part of the brain), which helps calm the emotional brain.

So instead of “off,” I named what I was really feeling: Overwhelmed. Self-doubting. Foggy. A bit disconnected.

It wasn’t comfortable—but it was clear. And that clarity was grounding.

Context Check: What’s Around Me That Might Be Affecting Me?

Sometimes our emotional state isn’t purely internal. External stressors, even subtle ones, shape our inner world.

Did I get enough sleep? Was that awkward conversation still echoing in my mind? Have I had water today, or just back-to-back caffeine?

Have I scrolled too much, consumed too much, or disconnected from what I actually need?

Context matters. Recognizing what’s influencing our state helps us approach ourselves with more compassion and less judgment.

What Do I Actually Need?

Not what I should do. Not what the calendar says.But what my nervous system, my body, and my heart are asking for.

Today, it wasn’t a massive reset. Just five deep breaths. A glass of water. Some fresh air. A reminder that not every thought is true, and not every feeling needs to be fixed. Sometimes, it just needs to be felt and acknowledged.

Why This Matters (Beyond the Moment)

We’re not taught to check in with ourselves. Most of us were raised to push through, to prioritize performance over presence. But the cost of that can be subtle and cumulative: Burnout. Disconnection. Anxiety. A chronic sense of “I’m doing everything… and still not okay.”

Practicing regular inner check-ins helps reverse that. It supports self-awareness, emotional regulation, and self-compassion—three pillars of both personal growth and emotional well-being. And in coaching or therapy, it’s often where real change begins.

Try It for Yourself

If you’ve been feeling scattered, overwhelmed, or low on clarity, ask yourself:

• What’s happening in my body right now?

• What’s the story my mind is telling me?

• Can I name this feeling more precisely?

• What outside factors might be affecting me?

• What do I need in this moment?

Take your time. There are no wrong answers.

This check-in didn’t solve everything. But it brought me back into connection—with my body, my mind, and what I actually needed in the moment.

That’s often enough to change the direction of the day.

So now I pass the question on to you:

How are you really feeling today? And what would it look like to meet yourself there, just as you are?